The most difficult thing for me to do as a Christian is pray for myself. It is not that I don't believe God hears me, and it is not that I don't believe in prayer, because I certainly do. It must be that I believe God has allowed everything to happen in my life for a reason, and by praying, I feel like I am seeking for my will to be done, and not His. Add to that the thought that I am but a speck in the Universe, and God has so many more serious issues with which to deal, I feel selfish whining about my little trials. Don't get me wrong; when it comes to praying for others, or when something tragic has happened or is about to happen, I have no problem crying out to my Lord.
It just seems to me that if God loves me, and I know He does; if God knows everything that is going to happen before it does, and I know He does; and if God can prevent evil from happening to me, and I know He can; then to continually pray about my circumstances actually feels like a lack of trust in Him. He knows the number of hairs on my head (Matt. 10:30), He knows when a sparrow falls to the ground (Matt. 10:29), and He clothes the lilies of the field (Matt. 6:28). Obviously He knows my needs, and since He loves me more than those things, I totally trust Him to take care of me.
Intellectually, I know I am supposed to pray because He told me to pray without ceasing (1 Thes. 5:17). He told me to pray about my daily bread, for my forgiveness, and for protection from temptation brought on by the evil one (Matt. 6:11-13). I know that when my prayers are answered, my faith in God increases. When I pray, I am forced to think like God thinks about things before I ask them of Him. The need for my prayers to be answered causes me to have my sin confessed to insure I am in fellowship with Him (1 Jn. 1:9).
My wife used to sing a song with the chorus that said:
I can pray out loud, or silently.
I can pray standing tall or on my knees.
It really makes no difference, its just that prayer is the key.
Cause prayer changes things and it changes me.
Today, I prayed for a family member who needs to believe in Jesus. Today, I prayed for my family. Today, I prayed for a friend whose church closed its doors, and whose wife had just passed away. And today, following hours of crawling on the floor to fix our "froze-up" computer, calls to those who might be able to help, and the horrible dread that everything we have on it might be lost, I finally prayed. I don't know what I did following that prayer, but whatever it was, the computer "thawed," and the mouse worked! He knew it would all the time, but He wasn't going to help me until I humbled myself and ask for His help. My faith is stronger, my pride has been humbled, and I can personally testify that prayer definitely changed me. Praise God!!!